Video

Tyrese Gibson – Compartmentalization Part 2 (Must Watch) “LOYALTY HAS AN EXPIRATION DATE”

Part 2 from Tyrese Gibson. Words of wisdom about taking control of your own life. What’s on your menu? Do you like what is served at your table or will you send it back? It is always your choice. You need to change your mind to change your life! Preach!

Question Me [Daily Prompt: Inside the Actor’s Studio]

On the interview show Inside the Actors’ Studio, host James Lipton asks each of his guests the same ten questions. What are your responses?

Daily Prompt: Inside the Actor’s Studio.

 

What is your favorite word?  I can’t think of one actually.

What is your least favorite word? P*ssy <– hate the word, unless used in the bedroom 😉

What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Nature

What turns you off? Humanity

What is your favorite curse word?  Cunt, and more so because people take words so seriously and who cares about a bunch of letters making a sound… people, we give life to “curse” words when all they are and ever will be are characters of language we created.

What sound or noise do you love?  Singing which leads to music

What sound or noise do you hate? Nail biting or Nail picking

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?  Performer (Singing, Actress)

What profession would you not like to do?  Embalmer

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Let me show and tell you why…

 

Don’t Want to Push Through Life [Daily Prompt: Six of One, Half a Dozen of the Other]

Write a six-word story about what you think the future holds for you, and then expand on it in a post.Photographers, artists, poets: show us SIX.

via Daily Prompt: Six of One, Half a Dozen of the Other.

“Don’t want to push through life”

I am glad I waited to write this post.  I felt good today.  I wasn’t dwelling on anything or stressing about anything.  The six-word story I decided on was “don’t want to push through life”.  After a conversation I had today with my father.

I was talking to him about my life.   At the end of my work day,  I guess I had a few moments where I started to think about what I had stressed about the day before.  So I wanted to vent about my job, my relationships with people and just life in general.  He told me I needed to let things go basically and just push through life  because there is nothing you can do about all these things that I keep stressing about.

At that moment, I realized that is what my daily post would be about.  I realized once again, I don’t want to just push through life and accept that I am destined to be routine.  I want more.  I want life to push through me.  I have expressed this time and time again, I need more for my life.  I don’t want to just coast the waves, I want to ride them head on and that may be why I am always so stressed.

I am constantly challenging myself and trying to perfect every minute of everyday but criticizing my every action.  I am pretty sure to be that obsessive is unhealthy.  For some reason,  I have this urge to be this super human, who can take life and make so much more than what society tells me it is destined to be.

At the end of the day, I don’t want to just push through.  I can’t and won’t let myself just be another body in this world.  I need more.  I want more.  I am destined for more.  I am not ashamed of trying to make this life more than mediocre.  I don’t think it is wrong to feel this way.  With this desire though comes struggle and trials.  All of which I must over come.

I haven’t figured out how I will conquer my goals and I am not sure exactly what it is that will make my life extraordinary.  All I know is I have to try.  So pray for me and wish me luck and hopefully I will be more than just a girl from New York, making a minimum salary and popping out kids that I can’t afford.

Don’t push through life.

Namelee [Daily Prompt: Name that… You!]

Do you know the meaning of your name, and why your parents chose it? Do you think it suits you? What about your children’s names?  Photographers, artists, poets: show us IDENTITY.

via Daily Prompt: Name that… You!.

I never really knew the meaning of my name.  Lisa means God’s promise and it comes from Elisabeth, Elizabeth.  “God’s Promise” seems pretty deep.  What is in a name really?  Who gives it that meaning?  Was my name a word used in language that they decided would be good to call someone?  Was the first person named Lisa extraordinary and full of God’s promise?  Did the person give the meaning to the name or did the name suit the person?

How could one really tell?  I was given my name at birth without a possibility of knowing what kind of person I would become.  When your parents name you, are you expected to live up to your name’s meaning?  I don’t think all parents name their children with the name’s meaning in mind.  I think it’s more of what sounds they like and if the names are cute or stand for something that exists in their family already.

From what I understand, my mother wanted to name me Christina.  My father wanted to name me Nina or Gina.  Neither parent liked their choice.  I don’t know how they arrived at Lisa.  I just remember my mother saying she liked the letter L.

I never liked my name.  I don’t know a lot of people who do. It is odd because you really can’t name yourself and you aren’t named based on your life or personality because it just started and no one has an idea yet of who you will be.  Does it suit me?  A lot of people call me Lee.  I like Lee.  I don’t know if I feel like a Lisa but then again how can you feel a name or feel a sound?  I think names are meant to identify ourselves and separate one from another so there is less confusion anyway.

And, in my research for the meaning of my name I found this on UrbanDictionary.com which I thought was really funny.

Lisa means : An intelligent and sexy female with LUSCIOUS physical features. Usually attracts weird guys named David who do absolutely NOTHING for her, but she still remains independent.

This is funny to me because I am Luscious Lee and my boyfriend’s name is Dave!  He does it all for me though so that is untrue but what a coincidence!

My Run-In with the Lord [Daily Prompt: In Good Faith]

Daily Prompt: In Good Faith.

I am not sure if this should be considered the first time I had experienced a true message from God but it was one that I remember and had a huge impact on my faith and life.

One Sunday morning in January of 2012, I attended church at the Brooklyn Tabernacle.  I had not been to the service in close to a year but my boyfriend and I were going through a difficult time and we decided to attend.  I had been praying and searching for answers leading up to that morning, concerning my relationship and what I should do because it was becoming unhealthy.  I was torn.

We sat arm in arm in the balcony section and the service began.  The chorus was praising God, singing, rejoicing and it felt nice to be in the presence of religion and spirituality.  Towards the final hour of the service, the Pastor began to read a passage from the Bible and relate it to our everyday lives.  Show us the messages imbedded in the text.

Pastor proceeded to speak of his interpretations of the passage when he pointed up at the balcony.  He preached and looked up high, “There is a woman sitting here today, a woman in the balcony and you have come today for some answers!  This situation you are, this relationship you are unsure of, you must let it go.  You have been praying and searching to do what is right and although you are helping someone else, you are hurting yourself and it has become unhealthy for you.  God knows this has been difficult but you have to leave this all behind you”, etc., etc.

The tears poured out of my eyes, ran down my face, I couldn’t even control it.  I though to myself, ‘He was talking to me’.  Even if he wasn’t, he was.  I hid my crying eyes and wet face in my boyfriend’s shoulder.  He knew what I had heard, he had heard it as well.  It was an obvious message.  I had been called out by God.  I cried for the remainder of the service.  I knew what eventually had to be done.  At that time, I wanted there to be an alternate way, an option that catered to what I wanted to happen not what was inevitable.  I think that was why I cried even more because I didn’t want to let go of this relationship that I struggled so hard to keep for 2+ years.  I wanted all my efforts and hard work to have paid off and I wanted my happy ending.

We went home that day, hardly had time to talk about it.  We either remained quiet or just spoke of a different subject.  He had to work an overnight shift so I was left alone with my thoughts.  I was in complete awe of what had happened.  How a message could be so clear and concise.  The next day, my boyfriend sat at the table and he started to cry.  He said the thought of losing me hurt him so much.  He explained that when he worked the overnight shift, he had to constantly go into a private room to cry from the thought that he couldn’t be with me anymore.  He told me that he knew that I heard the same message and he knew that God was being clear to both him and I.  He just didn’t want to face it.  He didn’t want to listen.    He spoke for hours about how it made him feel and then the conversation ended.  He never asked me how I felt.  He never asked me how I interpreted it or what was to be.  Maybe he was afraid, maybe he didn’t care.

Another painful, struggling 9 months would pass that year and everyday I would be reminded of what I heard by how unhappy I was and how much harder the days had become.  And then I had my moment, where I listened to what I was told and I ended that relationship.  If was difficult but it wasn’t hard.  He understood.  He knew it was time.  He knew that the message we had heard had been written in the stars and it was just a matter of time.  The clouds dissipated and the sun came shining through again.  I was better for it.

For almost 3 years of my life, I was conflicted and tried to fix a life that wasn’t my own at the expense of mentally and physically hurting myself.  I did all I could do for him but it was time to focus on my health and my well-being.  It was time to listen to God.  I took that leap in good faith,  reaped the reward and I am better for it.