Reflections [Daily Prompt: Regrets, I’ve Had a Few]

What’s your biggest regret? How would your life have been different if you’d made another decision?  Photographers, artists, poets: show us TURNING POINT.

via Daily Prompt: Regrets, I’ve Had a Few.

“Regrets, I’ve had a few but then again too few to mention.”Frank Sinatra

Regrets.  Regrets.  Regrets.  I never looked at my decisions as regrets about physical encounters and partying mishaps.  What I do regret are the choices I made within my mind to be the certain ways that I am.  It doesn’t come with birth.  You train yourself at a young age to be who you envision is the person you should be.

I wanted to be strong and prideful like my deceased grandfather, Louie.  I wanted to be unselfish about all that I could because my mother was so selfish.  I didn’t want to give the world a chance on trust because the person I trusted most betrayed me so I made myself believe that no one would ever love me or have good intentions concerning me.  I wanted to be powerful and invincible like my father.  I wanted to be as sexy as I possibly could because I saw the relevance it had on my grandmother, Fanny.  I wanted to be loving and nurturing because my Nonna was so neglected of love and I wanted to show her that there was someone out there who will love her and let her know about it.

I regret not taking the time to know myself because I was more concerning with imitating the strength of members of my family and rebelling against the traits like left scars on me.  I regret not giving myself a chance to be me without someone else’s reflection in the mirror.

I see why I don’t like what I see because it isn’t me.


13 thoughts on “Reflections [Daily Prompt: Regrets, I’ve Had a Few]

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