What’s your biggest regret? How would your life have been different if you’d made another decision? Photographers, artists, poets: show us TURNING POINT.
“Regrets, I’ve had a few but then again too few to mention.” – Frank Sinatra
Regrets. Regrets. Regrets. I never looked at my decisions as regrets about physical encounters and partying mishaps. What I do regret are the choices I made within my mind to be the certain ways that I am. It doesn’t come with birth. You train yourself at a young age to be who you envision is the person you should be.
I wanted to be strong and prideful like my deceased grandfather, Louie. I wanted to be unselfish about all that I could because my mother was so selfish. I didn’t want to give the world a chance on trust because the person I trusted most betrayed me so I made myself believe that no one would ever love me or have good intentions concerning me. I wanted to be powerful and invincible like my father. I wanted to be as sexy as I possibly could because I saw the relevance it had on my grandmother, Fanny. I wanted to be loving and nurturing because my Nonna was so neglected of love and I wanted to show her that there was someone out there who will love her and let her know about it.
I regret not taking the time to know myself because I was more concerning with imitating the strength of members of my family and rebelling against the traits like left scars on me. I regret not giving myself a chance to be me without someone else’s reflection in the mirror.
I see why I don’t like what I see because it isn’t me.